Here it is October 23rd and I sit, trying to find the right words. It has been several months since I last blogged and there have been SO many obstacles we have had to overcome. Where to start!?! Last I blogged, I was 20 weeks and we had our official gender reveal. Little did we know just a couple weeks later our world would be turned upside down, inside out, ripped into shreds, and changed for the rest of our lives.
Back in March, during Spring Break, I contacted my Dr. due to some extreme itching. I was toward the end of my 22nd week of pregnancy. I had been itching for a few weeks at this point and my ankles were starting to swell. The itching started in my feet and hands, then it consumed my whole body. I had a friend tell me about something called ICP (intrahepatic cholestasis of pregnancy). After reading about it, I wasn't sure if that's what I had because it said it doesn't usually occur until the third trimester, but I decided to contact my Dr. about it anyways and requested blood work. She agreed and had me go ahead and go in. They called me after the results came back and I for sure had it, of course! This was terrifying because if not treated, it can be harmful to the babies, so she immediately called me in a prescription.
The next week I went in for a Dr.'s appointment at 23 weeks. Looking back, it was a frustrating visit with my Dr. because we waited in the waiting room for over an hour, I had another ultrasound with the ultrasound tech, who again wasn't concerned with the third baby, didn't check my cervix for dilation, and when I got to the room to see my Dr., she was in the room for maybe 2 minutes before being called out. She mentioned Kylar having a little extra amniotic fluid in her sac, which can mean a few different things, and she was sending me to a Maternal Fetal Medicine Specialist for the ICP, then she was out the door. Knowing what I do now, I have no words. #speechless
Now the chapter of my life that I wish I could change, and the story I call life, begins...
Monday, March 24
We went in to see the MFM Specialist. Nervous to say the least, but very unprepared for what we were about to hear. The nurse came in, asked her questions and completed another ultrasound. When my Dr. came in, she asked us questions, we told her our story, and she began the ultrasound herself. This is where everything becomes complicated. This is when we find out I am considered pregnant with triplets, not twins. This is when Kylar becomes baby B and Knox is baby C, because the "third baby" is now baby A. This is when we find out there are bigger issues than just the ICP. This is when she explains that because Kylar and baby A are identical twins (because it was one embryo that split), their DNA is the same. What exactly does that mean and why does that matter?? Well, it means that because baby A had no heartbeat, was not formed correctly, but was continuing to grow, etc., we needed to figure out if there was something wrong with Kylar. My. Heart. Sank. She was also concerned with the amount of extra amniotic fluid that Kylar had. She explained that all of Kylar's measurements were normal and because she was an active baby, those were good signs. She at first thought there could be a chromosomal issue and wanted me to have blood work done to check the chromosomes. This is also when she checked my cervix on the ultrasound and put me on immediate bed rest because my cervix was starting to thin. This sure would have been good to know! This meant no walking around, no sitting up other than to eat or shower, no grocery shopping, no giving our 4 year old a bath or playing with him like before, etc. This broke my heart to say the least! His little world was about to be rocked and he had no clue! How do you explain this to a 4 year old?? I was scared to death and in inconsolable tears at this point, trying to hide my face as we walked out of the office. Thank goodness we were able to leave through a different door!
My Dr. sent me home on bed rest and called me the next day. She asked how I was doing and told me she had spoken to one of her partners about my case and they think it could be something called TRAP Sequence (twin reversed arterial perfusion sequence). She explained that it was extremely rare (1% chance of happening... I'd say that's pretty rare!) and they weren't for sure that's what it was, yet. IF this is what was going on, she explained there was a procedure that could be performed to fix it. Good, right? You would only hope! She wanted to me to go to Dallas to see her partner the next day so that he could take a look as well. Little did we know, this is where our lives really took a turn.
Wednesday, March 26th
Brandon and I made our way to Dallas to see the other specialist. We waited in the waiting room for what seemed to be an eternity. I'm pretty sure we were the last ones to be called back. When we finally got back to the room, the ultrasound tech started off the ultrasound, taking pictures of Kylar and the "third baby", measuring everything. The Dr. finally made it into the room and began another ultrasound for himself, remeasuring and checking everything for himself. Soon after, his other partner found himself in the room as well. IF in fact this was TRAP Sequence, this was probably the first and possibly one of the only times they would see it. Like I said earlier, it only happens in 1% of identical twin cases. (People often mistake this for Twin to Twin Transfusion. No, it's not the same. TRAP Sequence is when one of the identical twins is not fully formed, and gets blood flow from the fully formed twin. Ultimately causing cardiac failure from being overworked. Twin to Twin is basically when both babies are formed, but one gets more nutrients than the other.) After several minutes, the Dr. turned the ultrasound machine on where there were colors on the screen (checking for blood flow). I will never forget the words that came out of his mouth, "yep, there it is!" He was referring to the colors as the blood flow from Kylar to her identical twin. Now if you remember correctly, her twin did not have a heart, was not fully formed, but was growing because of the blood flow it was receiving from Kylar. The Dr. informed us that there was a specialist in Houston that could do a procedure to stop the blood flow from Kylar to the other baby. He stepped out of the room to contact the other Dr. When he came back in he told us that they would only do the procedure if my cervix was a 12 or more. Mine at this point was already thinned to an 8, therefore he couldn't do the procedure. We were at a loss. What I thought could be fixed, couldn't. My heart was broken. Being that I was just shy of 24 weeks pregnant, he put me on hospital bed rest to try and buy some time and for the babies to be constantly monitored. Especially Kylar because of her heart. After making some calls, he said neither hospital in Denton nor Flower Mound would be ready for something like this. He gave us the choice to either stay in Dallas or go to Lewisville where we would be closer to home. We obviously chose Lewisville and we couldn't be more happy with that decision.
When we arrived in Lewisville, my contractions were about a minute apart. The labor and delivery nurses were amazing! They worked very quickly and got the babies on monitors immediately. They gave me a shot to slow my contractions and started IV fluids. I was put at a decline back to take the pressure off my cervix and was confined to my bed. I could not get up for ANYTHING! Not even to eat. Try eating and drinking upside down. Needless to say after several days like that, my lungs began to hurt and I started getting a cough. One thing after another....
Monday, November 17, 2014
Wednesday, February 26, 2014
Official Gender Reveal!!
Last I posted, I was about 15 weeks, tomorrow I will be 20 weeks. HALF WAY THERE! Well, really probably more than half with twins. We went for the gender check at Visions of Love on Wednesday, January 29th. My mom went with me because we are trying to save some of Brandon's days for actual appointments and for when the little angels get here.
We walked in and it was only about 10 minutes before she took us back. I didn't want to tell her what the ultrasound tech had guessed, because I wanted to see what she said on her own. She started the ultrasound and of course she saw the third "baby". I hadn't mentioned it yet. She asked when the last time was that we had been to the Dr or had an ultrasound. I told her it was the 20th, then explained to her that she was actually looking at the third one. I explained to her that Baby A had split, but didn't develop all the way. She was relieved to know that we already knew :)
She moved on to Baby A, the baby that shares a sack with the third one. Of course, Baby A was flipping all around and not modest whatsoever! It only took a few seconds before she said, "well, Baby A is a GIRL!!" Clearly I wasn't surprised because we already expected them to be girls. She asked if that was what they had told me before, then said she didn't want to know until afterwards. I wasn't planning on telling her until she looked herself, anyways.
She then moved on to Baby B... this little baby wasn't so cooperative. After what felt like 10 minutes, and many different angels she said, "well, I am pretty sure Baby B is a boy". My mom and I looked at each other in shock, but I didn't believe her until I saw more proof. She continued to look, but he still wasn't cooperating. She asked if she could shake my stomach a little to see if she could get him to move. He moved a tad, but kept his legs crossed the entire time! Little stinker! :) Finally, she had me lay on my left side to see if that would help, and it did somewhat. She kept showing us different shots and saying that he was indeed a boy. Then finally, she turned the machine to 3D and got a pretty good shot. I was more convinced once I saw that picture. She was able to get about 6-7 more pictures showing us he was a boy, but I think I was still in shock.
The thing is, I wanted a boy! Obviously I would have been happy with whatever God gave us, but IF I had a choice, I wanted one of each. She asked if we were happy with a boy. She was probably wondering if we were excited or disappointed because we were a little quiet, but I think we were just both surprised. I reassured her that a boy and a girl was what I wanted, I had just already accepted that we were supposed to have two girls and started planning on that. I couldn't have been more happy! My mom and I just kept looking at each other and saying, "can you believe we have one of each?!?" Now I just had to rethink some of the nursery, but I will take it!!
We had another Dr.'s appointment on Monday, February 17. This was my monthly checkup at almost 19 weeks. I had gained about 8 pounds at this point. I guess that isn't too bad for being half way through my pregnancy with TWINS. It definitely takes some getting used to, but knowing that my babies are growing and getting the nutrition they need is most important. If I gain 50 lbs and know they are healthy, I am fine with that. Kylar was sleeping the whole time and had a heart rate of 138 bpm. Knox moved around a little and his heart rate was actually 20 beats faster than hers at 158 bpm. So if you have ever heard that the boy has a heart rate slower than a girl, that's not always the case! They have been pretty consistent with one another up until this point and hers was actually slower than his this time. Dr. P's exact words were, "she has her own little condo in there. He is fine, but she definitely takes up most of the space". She already seems to be bossing him around and taking over, poor guy! :)
We go tomorrow for our 20 week anatomy scan, so I will try and update as soon as I can. I can't say it enough... we are SO blessed that God chose us to be the parents of these two little angels. We thank you for your continued support and prayers throughout our journey and can't wait to meet our sweet babies!
We walked in and it was only about 10 minutes before she took us back. I didn't want to tell her what the ultrasound tech had guessed, because I wanted to see what she said on her own. She started the ultrasound and of course she saw the third "baby". I hadn't mentioned it yet. She asked when the last time was that we had been to the Dr or had an ultrasound. I told her it was the 20th, then explained to her that she was actually looking at the third one. I explained to her that Baby A had split, but didn't develop all the way. She was relieved to know that we already knew :)
She moved on to Baby A, the baby that shares a sack with the third one. Of course, Baby A was flipping all around and not modest whatsoever! It only took a few seconds before she said, "well, Baby A is a GIRL!!" Clearly I wasn't surprised because we already expected them to be girls. She asked if that was what they had told me before, then said she didn't want to know until afterwards. I wasn't planning on telling her until she looked herself, anyways.
She's a GIRL...
She then moved on to Baby B... this little baby wasn't so cooperative. After what felt like 10 minutes, and many different angels she said, "well, I am pretty sure Baby B is a boy". My mom and I looked at each other in shock, but I didn't believe her until I saw more proof. She continued to look, but he still wasn't cooperating. She asked if she could shake my stomach a little to see if she could get him to move. He moved a tad, but kept his legs crossed the entire time! Little stinker! :) Finally, she had me lay on my left side to see if that would help, and it did somewhat. She kept showing us different shots and saying that he was indeed a boy. Then finally, she turned the machine to 3D and got a pretty good shot. I was more convinced once I saw that picture. She was able to get about 6-7 more pictures showing us he was a boy, but I think I was still in shock.
The thing is, I wanted a boy! Obviously I would have been happy with whatever God gave us, but IF I had a choice, I wanted one of each. She asked if we were happy with a boy. She was probably wondering if we were excited or disappointed because we were a little quiet, but I think we were just both surprised. I reassured her that a boy and a girl was what I wanted, I had just already accepted that we were supposed to have two girls and started planning on that. I couldn't have been more happy! My mom and I just kept looking at each other and saying, "can you believe we have one of each?!?" Now I just had to rethink some of the nursery, but I will take it!!
We had another Dr.'s appointment on Monday, February 17. This was my monthly checkup at almost 19 weeks. I had gained about 8 pounds at this point. I guess that isn't too bad for being half way through my pregnancy with TWINS. It definitely takes some getting used to, but knowing that my babies are growing and getting the nutrition they need is most important. If I gain 50 lbs and know they are healthy, I am fine with that. Kylar was sleeping the whole time and had a heart rate of 138 bpm. Knox moved around a little and his heart rate was actually 20 beats faster than hers at 158 bpm. So if you have ever heard that the boy has a heart rate slower than a girl, that's not always the case! They have been pretty consistent with one another up until this point and hers was actually slower than his this time. Dr. P's exact words were, "she has her own little condo in there. He is fine, but she definitely takes up most of the space". She already seems to be bossing him around and taking over, poor guy! :)
Knox Joseph Kylar Grace
We go tomorrow for our 20 week anatomy scan, so I will try and update as soon as I can. I can't say it enough... we are SO blessed that God chose us to be the parents of these two little angels. We thank you for your continued support and prayers throughout our journey and can't wait to meet our sweet babies!
Tuesday, January 28, 2014
14 1/2 weeks
Last Monday, January 20th was my last appointment. I went in for my monthly appointment. We went to the regular room first, then they moved me to the ultrasound room. Dr. Paroski told me that I will have an ultrasound every time I go because with twins it is harder to differentiate heartbeats on a Doppler and she likes to check on them to make sure they are where they should be. I am TOTALLY fine with that! I couldn't imagine not seeing them as much as I have and/or do. It puts me at ease knowing they are still moving around and I like to see how much they've grown.
They were both measuring right around where they were supposed to be. I was 14 weeks 4 days that day. Baby A was measuring 13 weeks 5 days with a heart rate of 156 bpm, and baby B was measuring 14 weeks 2 days with a heart rate of 156 bpm. They had the exact same heart rate! So sweet :) That day they were feet to feet instead of one on top of the other and were kicking at one another... OH BOY!! She checked on the third one because it seems to be growing and not dissolving. She said it still looked like there was no heartbeat, so it should eventually dissolve. Everything looked great and I go tomorrow, January 29th for confirmation about gender. Hopefully they cooperate so that I can finalize decisions about the nursery and get the ball rolling with everything!
They were both measuring right around where they were supposed to be. I was 14 weeks 4 days that day. Baby A was measuring 13 weeks 5 days with a heart rate of 156 bpm, and baby B was measuring 14 weeks 2 days with a heart rate of 156 bpm. They had the exact same heart rate! So sweet :) That day they were feet to feet instead of one on top of the other and were kicking at one another... OH BOY!! She checked on the third one because it seems to be growing and not dissolving. She said it still looked like there was no heartbeat, so it should eventually dissolve. Everything looked great and I go tomorrow, January 29th for confirmation about gender. Hopefully they cooperate so that I can finalize decisions about the nursery and get the ball rolling with everything!
Baby A- kicked back relaxing :) Baby B
I actually felt the first continuous flutter on Sunday, January 19th. The day before the appointment. My mom, grandma, and aunt had come over to help paint the nursery while Brandon was sanding and priming the cribs and dressers. My mom and I had jumped in the car to make a sonic drink run for everyone. I felt one of them in the car a few different times. Then, this last Sunday, January 26th I had just finished a bath and laid down when I felt another movement. This time was more than just a faint flutter. I pushed down lightly on my stomach to see if I could feel (her) it again, and whichever baby it was decided to give a strong like kick or movement. It actually scared me enough to make me jump (which doesn't take much), because I wasn't expecting it. She either likes her privacy or decided to showing off for mommy!
We are so blessed that God chose us to finally become parents to not only one, but TWO sweet babies! We can't thank him enough for our answered prayers, and as always we thank everyone who prays for us and follows us on this journey!
Baby A waving goodbye until next time :)
Monday, January 6, 2014
It's a double Happy New Year!!
It seems like it's been forever since I last updated. Last I updated, we had gone in for our last appointment with the specialist and heard the heartbeats. I have actually been back a couple of times since then. I went for my first appointment with my regular OB on Monday, December 23rd. At that point I was 10 weeks 4 days. We got to see the babies moving around and heard their heartbeats again :) Baby A was measuring 10 weeks 1 day and had a heart beat of 175 bpm. Baby B was measuring a few days ahead, 11 weeks and had a heart beat of 156 bpm. Baby B was doing flips and somersaults the whole time, but still had the lower heart rate than Baby A. (I think Baby A might be a little mischievous because it was still the whole time :)
Our ultrasound that day was about 8 minutes, so we got to watch them for a good amount of time. The ultrasound tech measured them, we checked the heart beats, and she measured the nuchal fold of each baby. Today, Baby A was doing somersaults :) The ultrasound tech could hardly get baby A to lay still for the nuchal fold screening. Everything looked great for the screening. Such a relief! On this day, I was 12 weeks. Baby A was measuring 12 weeks 2 days with a heart rate of 156 bpm, Baby B was still measuring a couple days ahead of Baby A at 12 weeks 5 days with a heart rate of 158 bpm. I asked if she could tell what the sexes were and she said she could take a good guess. She first looked at Baby B because that was that still baby for today. She estimated that Baby B was a girl and showed us why she thought that. Then she finally got a shot of Baby A, and estimated this one was a girl also :) This one was a little harder to see, but she said she was 90% sure after checking. I will wait until it is confirmed before I get my mind set on anything.
Today, January 6th, I woke up and had some light spotting. I tried really hard not to freak out or worry because I know it can be common, especially with twins. But of course I start crying on my way to work. My Dr. had me come in this morning just to make sure everything looked fine, and thank God they were both still moving around and their hearts were still beating strong. Baby A was actually kicked back, relaxing with it's arm raised :)
My next appointment was January 2nd. This appointment was for our first trimester screening. To give you a little background on the first trimester screening, it's an optional noninvasive evaluation that combines a maternal blood screening test with an ultrasound evaluation of the fetus to identify risk for specific chromosomal abnormalities, including Down Syndrome Trisomy-21 and Trisomy-18. In addition to screening for these abnormalities, a portion of the test (known as the nuchal translucency) can assist in identifying other significant fetal abnormalities, such as cardiac disorders.
Our ultrasound that day was about 8 minutes, so we got to watch them for a good amount of time. The ultrasound tech measured them, we checked the heart beats, and she measured the nuchal fold of each baby. Today, Baby A was doing somersaults :) The ultrasound tech could hardly get baby A to lay still for the nuchal fold screening. Everything looked great for the screening. Such a relief! On this day, I was 12 weeks. Baby A was measuring 12 weeks 2 days with a heart rate of 156 bpm, Baby B was still measuring a couple days ahead of Baby A at 12 weeks 5 days with a heart rate of 158 bpm. I asked if she could tell what the sexes were and she said she could take a good guess. She first looked at Baby B because that was that still baby for today. She estimated that Baby B was a girl and showed us why she thought that. Then she finally got a shot of Baby A, and estimated this one was a girl also :) This one was a little harder to see, but she said she was 90% sure after checking. I will wait until it is confirmed before I get my mind set on anything.
Today, January 6th, I woke up and had some light spotting. I tried really hard not to freak out or worry because I know it can be common, especially with twins. But of course I start crying on my way to work. My Dr. had me come in this morning just to make sure everything looked fine, and thank God they were both still moving around and their hearts were still beating strong. Baby A was actually kicked back, relaxing with it's arm raised :)
Continued prayers are always welcomed and appreciated! I pray every night and day that I can carry these babies full term or as close as possible, and that they are both healthy. Thank you to all our friends and family that continue to pray for us and follow us on this amazing journey!
Thursday, December 12, 2013
More Confirmation
Sorry it's been a while since my last post, I wanted to wait to blog until I had confirmation after confirmation :) Well, as most of you already know.... WE'RE PREGNANT!! The last time I blogged I was on day 5 after the transfer. My next appointment was the next Friday, November 8 for blood work to see if my HCG levels were high enough, which says if you are pregnant or not. For some reason, on Monday the 4th (the day after I wrote my last blog) I got a feeling while sitting at Kaiden's therapy. When Kaiden and I got home, I wasn't even sure if I had a pregnancy test. Sure enough when I looked, there was one shoved under my sink to the very back. I thought, why not! I nonchalantly took the test, let Chloe (the dog) outside and walked back to look at the test, thinking I was going to see a "not pregnant" on the screen. To my surprise, it said "pregnant". I was in complete and utter shock! I didn't know what to think. We had been waiting on this moment for two and a half years! I wanted to surprise Brandon with the news, so Kaiden and I jumped back in the car, went and bought a big brother shirt, and made it back home right after Brandon was home. Kaiden had his new shirt on and handed daddy the test. The look on his face was priceless :)
I was measuring right on track and everything looked good. Again, I still wanted to wait, now for the heartbeat sonogram. Monday, December 2nd was our next appointment to hear the heartbeats. We went in and the two little sacs were still there and you could actually see the little miracles in them this time. After measuring them both and listening to the heartbeats of both, everything sounded great! Baby A was measuring 7 weeks 3 days and had a heart beat of 160 bpm. Baby B was measuring 6 weeks 6 days with a heart beat of 167 bpm. Everything was GREAT and we were all a little emotional. Looking back at the sac with Baby A, I saw something else and I noticed the Dr taking a look at it. When I asked what it was, he said, "well it is actually another baby, but I don't see a heart beat on this one yet and it's measuring a little behind the other two. It looks like you almost had triplets!" WHAT?!? That little one was measuring 6 weeks 3 days, so about a week behind. He explained that it would probably just dissolve. We won't know until we go back on December 23rd, if the third baby actually pulled through or if it just wasn't meant to be. As sad as I would be to hear that the third baby didn't make it, I know the other two are the embryos we put in, and we are thankful for whatever God gives us!
I feel beyond blessed, and want to thank all of you again for all the love and support you have shown and still show on a daily basis.
Friday came along, and even though I cheated Monday, I didn't want to get my hopes up just yet. They took my blood and off I went. About two o'clock they called to let me know what my levels were. I was pulling up to a photo shoot when I got the phone call, "congratulations Jennifer, you are pregnant. Your levels were 487". Keep in mind that pretty much anything over a 5 is "technically" considered pregnant. Pregnancy tests usually test for about a 20 or 25. She did say my levels were high, which could mean possible twins, but could also mean one good healthy pregnancy. I still didn't want to get my hopes up and still needed more confirmation. I wanted to see what my levels were on my next blood work appointment. They are usually supposed to double within a day or so. I went back that next Monday and my levels had gone up to 1917. They had almost quadrupled! My jaw about fell off when she called me that day. Still, I wanted to wait. At least until I went back for the first sonogram to make sure the sacs were there and looked good. I went in the next Monday, November 18th. "Surprise, there are two!" 
I was measuring right on track and everything looked good. Again, I still wanted to wait, now for the heartbeat sonogram. Monday, December 2nd was our next appointment to hear the heartbeats. We went in and the two little sacs were still there and you could actually see the little miracles in them this time. After measuring them both and listening to the heartbeats of both, everything sounded great! Baby A was measuring 7 weeks 3 days and had a heart beat of 160 bpm. Baby B was measuring 6 weeks 6 days with a heart beat of 167 bpm. Everything was GREAT and we were all a little emotional. Looking back at the sac with Baby A, I saw something else and I noticed the Dr taking a look at it. When I asked what it was, he said, "well it is actually another baby, but I don't see a heart beat on this one yet and it's measuring a little behind the other two. It looks like you almost had triplets!" WHAT?!? That little one was measuring 6 weeks 3 days, so about a week behind. He explained that it would probably just dissolve. We won't know until we go back on December 23rd, if the third baby actually pulled through or if it just wasn't meant to be. As sad as I would be to hear that the third baby didn't make it, I know the other two are the embryos we put in, and we are thankful for whatever God gives us!
Sunday, November 3, 2013
Transfer day!!
Well, transfer day has come and gone. Last Tuesday we didn't have to be at the Dr.'s office until 12:30, so I actually worked a half day in the morning to keep my mind busy. My mom came with me to work so she could drive me home after the transfer and Brandon could go back to work. Brandon met us at the Dr's office at 12:30. We got called back to the room pretty quickly, I changed into my lovely gown and waited for Dr. Le to come in.
The embryologist was actually the first one to come in and talk to us. She handed me a picture of our little embryos. I was so excited when she handed them to me because I was hoping to get to see them. She explained the grading of each embryo and what the number and each letter meant. When I asked about the others, she said they would call me within the next two days and let me know how many had progressed enough for freezing.
For the inner cell mass:
A: Many cells, tightly packed
B: several cells, loosely packed
C: very few cells
The trophectoderm grading goes like this:
A: many cells, forming a cohesive layer
B: Few cells, forming a loose layer
C: Very few large cells.
The embryologist was actually the first one to come in and talk to us. She handed me a picture of our little embryos. I was so excited when she handed them to me because I was hoping to get to see them. She explained the grading of each embryo and what the number and each letter meant. When I asked about the others, she said they would call me within the next two days and let me know how many had progressed enough for freezing.
The embryo on the top is a 2BB and the one on the bottom is a 2CC. Because it was still early in the day on the 5th day, it still had some growing to do which is ok. The embryo grading is as follows:
Grade 1: the fluid-filled cavity takes up less than half the space of the embryo.
Grade 2: the fluid-filled cavity takes up more than half the space of the embryo.
Grade 3: the blastocyst cavity has expanded into the entire volume of the embryo, pressing the trophectoderm cells up tightly against the inside of the zona.
Grade 4: Expanded blastocyst, where the blastocyst has increased beyond the original volume of the embryo and caused the zona pellucida “shell” to become super thin.
5: Embryo has breached the zona and is hatching out of its shell Grade 6: Embryo is completely hatched.
The letters following the numbers mean:
A: Many cells, tightly packed
B: several cells, loosely packed
C: very few cells
The trophectoderm grading goes like this:
A: many cells, forming a cohesive layer
B: Few cells, forming a loose layer
C: Very few large cells.
So, you can see that the top embryo is a little further along than the bottom one. He said if he had the same embryologist grade the same embryos about 30 minutes later, they would give it a different grade because they grow pretty quickly. He said these embryos are "beautiful" and was hopeful, which made me more hopeful. He had me lay back on the table and wanted to make sure he could get through my cervix easily, before they brought the embryos from the lab. Once he had the catheter in, the embryologist brought in our sweet embryos. He put them in the catheter and said, "Ok, happy thoughts, they are in!" The embryologist took the catheter back to the lab to make sure they were not left in there and all was clear. He leaned the table back and I had to lay at a decline (or incline) however you look at it) for about 45 minutes. When Dr. Le left the tears started to flow! I had been holding them in since the embryologist brought me my picture. Once I started to cry, of course my mom started to cry. It is such an emotional roller coaster! Having that attachment to my babies (embryos) and knowing the rest is out of my control is a hard concept to swallow. The rest is in God's hands, and all I have to do is trust in him.
All that was left in the room was my mom, Brandon, and myself, so we decided to say a little prayer. Crying once again. I laid back for about 45 minutes, the nurse came in and said we could leave, and I just had to take it easy the rest of the day. I had to lay down on the way home. We picked up lunch on our way home, and both laid down pretty much the rest of the day. I had put stuff together in the crock pot for chicken taco soup for dinner, so nothing else had to be done but sleep. Of course I couldn't sleep, my anxiety was through the roof, but at least I could rest. So now we wait until next Friday when I go in for blood work to see if it all worked.
The next day I received a phone call from the embryologist that I would have one, possibly two embryos for freezing. They were going to continue to watch the others to see if they made any progression and let me know. When I asked her what they look for in determining if they are good enough to freeze, she said if they don't continue to grow like they are suppose to they aren't good embryos to freeze for a different transfer. Thursday, she called back and informed me that I had one embryo to freeze. I was a little disappointed that the others hadn't progressed enough, but again I had to remind myself to be thankful that I had one to freeze. It is absolutely better than none!
Today is 5 days past the embryo transfer and I have 5 more days to go! I have been at peace with the whole process, and all I can do is wait until Friday. I pray about it probably a hundred times a day, and that's all I can do. Thanks again for all the support, and we just ask that you continue to pray for us in this journey.
Pray for anything, and if you have Faith you will receive it. - Mathew 21:22
Monday, October 28, 2013
Retrieval and Pre-Transfer
Last Thursday was egg retrieval day. I was beyond nervous! There are so many questions, concerns, and worries that go through your head beforehand. We had to be at the Dr's office to check in at 9 and the procedure was scheduled for 10. My mom came with us so that she could bring me home to rest after the procedure and Brandon could go back to work.
The nurse called me back and took my blood pressure and temperature. Clearly my blood pressure was a little high, seeing as I was about to be put under for one of the most important decisions in my life. At the same time they took me, they called Brandon to a different room. Mom and I went to the recovery room, I had to change into the hospital gown and get ready for them to come get me for the procedure. One of the specialists, Dr. Escobar came in and said it would only be about 20 minutes or so and he would come get me. The anesthesiologist came in and asked some questions and explained what was going to happen.
The nurse finally took me back to the operating room. Once I was in there, I had to verify my name and number with the embryologist that would be contacting me the next day to let me know how many eggs fertilized. After the procedure, the Dr. told me he was able to retrieve 8 eggs. I was expecting more, but was and am absolutely thankful for the eggs they were able to retrieve!
The next day, which was Friday, I received a phone call from the embryologist during my lunch with two of my team members. She said that out of the 8 eggs retrieved, 6 of them fertilized on their own. I wanted to just cry. It took everything I had to hold back tears! I don't know which emotion was the strongest. Relief, joy, excitement, or all of the above. Just to think, I now have 6 babies growing as we speak. They may not be growing inside me at the moment, but they were mine and they had made it this far! She said that another embryologist would be contacting me on Sunday to update me on the embryo's progress. No matter how many prayers I say or how much faith I put into this process, there is always a distant fear in the back of my mind. It's only natural after all the disappointments we have been though on this journey, but I will not give up! When I get that feeling of fear, I try and push it away with more faith and positive thoughts.
Sunday was here and I was trying to keep busy. We had Kaiden for the weekend, and two of my nieces which helped pass the time. We were cleaning when my phone rang. When I answered and she told me that all 6 embryos were still growing as expected and looked great, again all I wanted to do was cry. I hung up with the embryologist, and sat in the floor for a few minutes and just cried. I never knew the attachment I would feel to those 6 embryos beforehand. It's one of the most surreal feelings knowing I have 6 potential babies growing. For the majority of people at this point in pregnancy, they don't even know they are pregnant. For us, we know how many fertilized and we know how many have survived thus far. The embryologist said my embryo transfer date was Tuesday (tomorrow), and they wouldn't know until that morning which two embryos would be placed inside my uterus.
So here I am, the night before THE most important day of this whole process! All I can do is pray, pray, and pray harder that tomorrow will be successful, that my body cooperates, and the little embryos are able to implant. After tomorrow, there is about a 10 day gap before I will go back in and have blood work done to confirm pregnant or not pregnant. I ask that you continue to pray and keep us in your thoughts tomorrow and through the next 10 days or so.
The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.- Deuteronomy 31:8
The nurse called me back and took my blood pressure and temperature. Clearly my blood pressure was a little high, seeing as I was about to be put under for one of the most important decisions in my life. At the same time they took me, they called Brandon to a different room. Mom and I went to the recovery room, I had to change into the hospital gown and get ready for them to come get me for the procedure. One of the specialists, Dr. Escobar came in and said it would only be about 20 minutes or so and he would come get me. The anesthesiologist came in and asked some questions and explained what was going to happen.
The nurse finally took me back to the operating room. Once I was in there, I had to verify my name and number with the embryologist that would be contacting me the next day to let me know how many eggs fertilized. After the procedure, the Dr. told me he was able to retrieve 8 eggs. I was expecting more, but was and am absolutely thankful for the eggs they were able to retrieve!
The next day, which was Friday, I received a phone call from the embryologist during my lunch with two of my team members. She said that out of the 8 eggs retrieved, 6 of them fertilized on their own. I wanted to just cry. It took everything I had to hold back tears! I don't know which emotion was the strongest. Relief, joy, excitement, or all of the above. Just to think, I now have 6 babies growing as we speak. They may not be growing inside me at the moment, but they were mine and they had made it this far! She said that another embryologist would be contacting me on Sunday to update me on the embryo's progress. No matter how many prayers I say or how much faith I put into this process, there is always a distant fear in the back of my mind. It's only natural after all the disappointments we have been though on this journey, but I will not give up! When I get that feeling of fear, I try and push it away with more faith and positive thoughts.
Sunday was here and I was trying to keep busy. We had Kaiden for the weekend, and two of my nieces which helped pass the time. We were cleaning when my phone rang. When I answered and she told me that all 6 embryos were still growing as expected and looked great, again all I wanted to do was cry. I hung up with the embryologist, and sat in the floor for a few minutes and just cried. I never knew the attachment I would feel to those 6 embryos beforehand. It's one of the most surreal feelings knowing I have 6 potential babies growing. For the majority of people at this point in pregnancy, they don't even know they are pregnant. For us, we know how many fertilized and we know how many have survived thus far. The embryologist said my embryo transfer date was Tuesday (tomorrow), and they wouldn't know until that morning which two embryos would be placed inside my uterus.
So here I am, the night before THE most important day of this whole process! All I can do is pray, pray, and pray harder that tomorrow will be successful, that my body cooperates, and the little embryos are able to implant. After tomorrow, there is about a 10 day gap before I will go back in and have blood work done to confirm pregnant or not pregnant. I ask that you continue to pray and keep us in your thoughts tomorrow and through the next 10 days or so.
The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.- Deuteronomy 31:8
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