It's a double Happy New Year!!

It seems like it's been forever since I last updated. Last I updated, we had gone in for our last appointment with the specialist and heard the heartbeats. I have actually been back a couple of times since then. I went for my first appointment with my regular OB on Monday, December 23rd. At that point I was 10 weeks 4 days. We got to see the babies moving around and heard their heartbeats again :) Baby A was measuring 10 weeks 1 day and had a heart beat of 175 bpm. Baby B was measuring a few days ahead, 11 weeks and had a heart beat of 156 bpm. Baby B was doing flips and somersaults the whole time, but still had the lower heart rate than Baby A. (I think Baby A might be a little mischievous because it was still the whole time :)



 

 

 

My next appointment was January 2nd. This appointment was for our first trimester screening. To give you a little background on the first trimester screening, it's an optional noninvasive evaluation that combines a maternal blood screening test with an ultrasound evaluation of the fetus to identify risk for specific chromosomal abnormalities, including Down Syndrome Trisomy-21 and Trisomy-18. In addition to screening for these abnormalities, a portion of the test (known as the nuchal translucency) can assist in identifying other significant fetal abnormalities, such as cardiac disorders.

Our ultrasound that day was about 8 minutes, so we got to watch them for a good amount of time. The ultrasound tech measured them, we checked the heart beats, and she measured the nuchal fold of each baby. Today, Baby A was doing somersaults :) The ultrasound tech could hardly get baby A to lay still for the nuchal fold screening. Everything looked great for the screening. Such a relief! On this day, I was 12 weeks. Baby A was measuring 12 weeks 2 days with a heart rate of 156 bpm, Baby B was still measuring a couple days ahead of Baby A at 12 weeks 5 days with a heart rate of 158 bpm. I asked if she could tell what the sexes were and she said she could take a good guess. She first looked at Baby B because that was that still baby for today. She estimated that Baby B was a girl and showed us why she thought that. Then she finally got a shot of Baby A, and estimated this one was a girl also :) This one was a little harder to see, but she said she was 90% sure after checking. I will wait until it is confirmed before I get my mind set on anything.

Today, January 6th, I woke up and had some light spotting. I tried really hard not to freak out or worry because I know it can be common, especially with twins. But of course I start crying on my way to work.  My Dr. had me come in this morning just to make sure everything looked fine, and thank God they were both still moving around and their hearts were still beating strong. Baby A was actually kicked back, relaxing with it's arm raised :)

 

Continued prayers are always welcomed and appreciated! I pray every night and day that I can carry these babies full term or as close as possible, and that they are both healthy. Thank you to all our friends and family that continue to pray for us and follow us on this amazing journey!

More Confirmation

Sorry it's been a while since my last post, I wanted to wait to blog until I had confirmation after confirmation :) Well, as most of you already know.... WE'RE PREGNANT!! The last time I blogged I was on day 5 after the transfer. My next appointment was the next Friday, November 8 for blood work to see if my HCG levels were high enough, which says if you are pregnant or not. For some reason, on Monday the 4th (the day after I wrote my last blog) I got a feeling while sitting at Kaiden's therapy. When Kaiden and I got home, I wasn't even sure if I had a pregnancy test.  Sure enough when I looked, there was one shoved under my sink to the very back.  I thought, why not! I nonchalantly took the test, let Chloe (the dog) outside and walked back to look at the test, thinking I was going to see a "not pregnant" on the screen. To my surprise, it said "pregnant". I was in complete and utter shock! I didn't know what to think. We had been waiting on this moment for two and a half years! I wanted to surprise Brandon with the news, so Kaiden and I jumped back in the car, went and bought a big brother shirt, and made it back home right after Brandon was home. Kaiden had his new shirt on and handed daddy the test. The look on his face was priceless :)



Friday came along, and even though I cheated Monday, I didn't want to get my hopes up just yet. They took my blood and off I went. About two o'clock they called to let me know what my levels were. I was pulling up to a photo shoot when I got the phone call, "congratulations Jennifer, you are pregnant. Your levels were 487". Keep in mind that pretty much anything over a 5 is "technically" considered pregnant. Pregnancy tests usually test for about a 20 or 25. She did say my levels were high, which could mean possible twins, but could also mean one good healthy pregnancy. I still didn't want to get my hopes up and still needed more confirmation. I wanted to see what my levels were on my next blood work appointment. They are usually supposed to double within a day or so. I went back that next Monday and my levels had gone up to 1917. They had almost quadrupled! My jaw about fell off when she called me that day. Still, I wanted to wait. At least until I went back for the first sonogram to make sure the sacs were there and looked good. I went in the next Monday, November 18th. "Surprise, there are two!"

I was measuring right on track and everything looked good. Again, I still wanted to wait, now for the heartbeat sonogram. Monday, December 2nd was our next appointment to hear the heartbeats. We went in and the two little sacs were still there and you could actually see the little miracles in them this time. After measuring them both and listening to the heartbeats of both, everything sounded great! Baby A was measuring 7 weeks 3 days and had a heart beat of 160 bpm. Baby B was measuring 6 weeks 6 days with a  heart beat of 167 bpm. Everything was GREAT and we were all a little emotional. Looking back at the sac with Baby A, I saw something else and I noticed the Dr taking a look at it. When I asked what it was, he said, "well it is actually another baby, but I don't see a heart beat on this one yet and it's measuring a little behind the other two. It looks like you almost had triplets!" WHAT?!? That little one was measuring 6 weeks 3 days, so about a week behind. He explained that it would probably just dissolve. We won't know until we go back on December 23rd, if the third baby actually pulled through or if it just wasn't meant to be. As sad as I would be to hear that the third baby didn't make it, I know the other two are the embryos we put in, and we are thankful for whatever God gives us!

I feel beyond blessed, and want to thank all of you again for all the love and support you have shown and still show on a daily basis.

Transfer day!!

Well, transfer day has come and gone. Last Tuesday we didn't have to be at the Dr.'s office until 12:30, so I actually worked a half day in the morning to keep my mind busy. My mom came with me to work so she could drive me home after the transfer and Brandon could go back to work. Brandon met us at the Dr's office at 12:30. We got called back to the room pretty quickly, I changed into my lovely gown and waited for Dr. Le to come in.

 The embryologist was actually the first one to come in and talk to us. She handed me a picture of our little embryos. I was so excited when she handed them to me because I was hoping to get to see them. She explained the grading of each embryo and what the number and each letter meant. When I asked about the others, she said they would call me within the next two days and let me know how many had progressed enough for freezing.

The embryo on the top is a 2BB and the one on the bottom is a 2CC. Because it was still early in the day on the 5th day, it still had some growing to do which is ok. The embryo grading is as follows:

 

Grade 1: the fluid-filled cavity takes up less than half the space of the embryo.

 

Grade 2: the fluid-filled cavity takes up more than half the space of the embryo.

 

Grade 3: the blastocyst cavity has expanded into the entire volume of the embryo, pressing the trophectoderm cells up tightly against the inside of the zona.

 

Grade 4: Expanded blastocyst, where the blastocyst has increased beyond the original volume of the embryo and caused the zona pellucida “shell” to become super thin.

 

5: Embryo has breached the zona and is hatching out of its shell Grade 6: Embryo is completely hatched.

 

The letters following the numbers mean:

 

For the inner cell mass:

A: Many cells, tightly packed
B: several cells, loosely packed
C: very few cells

The trophectoderm grading goes like this:

A: many cells, forming a cohesive layer
B: Few cells, forming a loose layer
C: Very few large cells.

 

So, you can see that the top embryo is a little further along than the bottom one. He said if he had the same embryologist grade the same embryos about 30 minutes later, they would give it a different grade because they grow pretty quickly. He said these embryos are "beautiful" and was hopeful, which  made me more hopeful. He had me lay back on the table and wanted to make sure he could get through my cervix easily, before they brought the embryos from the lab. Once he had the catheter in, the embryologist brought in our sweet embryos. He put them in the catheter and said, "Ok, happy thoughts, they are in!" The embryologist took the catheter back to the lab to make sure they were not left in there and all was clear. He leaned the table back and I had to lay at a decline (or incline) however you look at it) for about 45 minutes. When Dr. Le left the tears started to flow! I had been holding them in since the embryologist brought me my picture. Once I started to cry, of course my mom started to cry. It is such an emotional roller coaster! Having that attachment to my babies (embryos) and knowing the rest is out of my control is a hard concept to swallow.  The rest is in God's hands, and all I have to do is trust in him.

 

 

All that was left in the room was my mom, Brandon, and myself, so we decided to say a little prayer. Crying once again. I laid back for about 45 minutes, the nurse came in and said we could leave, and I just had to take it easy the rest of the day. I had to lay down on the way home. We picked up lunch on our way home, and both laid down pretty much the rest of the day. I had put stuff together in the crock pot for chicken taco soup for dinner, so nothing else had to be done but sleep. Of course I couldn't sleep, my anxiety was through the roof, but at least I could rest. So now we wait until next Friday when I go in for blood work to see if it all worked.

 

The next day I received a phone call from the embryologist that I would have one, possibly two embryos for freezing. They were going to continue to watch the others to see if they made any progression and let me know.  When I asked her what they look for in determining if they are good enough to freeze, she said if they don't continue to grow like they are suppose to they aren't good embryos to freeze for a different transfer. Thursday, she called back and informed me that I had one embryo to freeze. I was a little disappointed that the others hadn't progressed enough, but again I had to remind myself to be thankful that I had one to freeze. It is absolutely better than none!

 

Today is 5 days past the embryo transfer and I have 5 more days to go! I have been at peace with the whole process, and all I can do is wait until Friday. I pray about it probably a hundred times a day, and that's all I can do. Thanks again for all the support, and we just ask that you continue to pray for us in this journey.

 

Pray for anything, and if you have Faith you will receive it. - Mathew 21:22

 



Retrieval and Pre-Transfer

Last Thursday was egg retrieval day. I was beyond nervous! There are so many questions, concerns, and worries that go through your head beforehand. We had to be at the Dr's office to check in at 9 and the procedure was scheduled for 10. My mom came with us so that she could bring me home to rest after the procedure and Brandon could go back to work.

The nurse called me back and took my blood pressure and temperature. Clearly my blood pressure was a little high, seeing as I was about to be put under for one of the most important decisions in my life. At the same time they took me, they called Brandon to a different room. Mom and I went to the recovery room, I had to change into the hospital gown and get ready for them to come get me for the procedure. One of the specialists, Dr. Escobar came in and said it would only be about 20 minutes or so and he would come get me. The anesthesiologist came in and asked some questions and explained what was going to happen.



The nurse finally took me back to the operating room. Once I was in there, I had to verify my name and number with the embryologist that would be contacting me the next day to let me know how many eggs fertilized. After the procedure, the Dr. told me he was able to retrieve 8 eggs. I was expecting more, but was and am absolutely thankful for the eggs they were able to retrieve!

The next day, which was Friday, I received a phone call from the embryologist during my lunch with two of my team members. She said that out of the 8 eggs retrieved, 6 of them fertilized on their own. I wanted to just cry. It took everything I had to hold back tears! I don't know which emotion was the strongest. Relief, joy, excitement, or all of the above. Just to think, I now have 6 babies growing as we speak. They may not be growing inside me at the moment, but they were mine and they had made it this far! She said that another embryologist would be contacting me on Sunday to update me on the embryo's progress. No matter how many prayers I say or how much faith I put into this process, there is always a distant fear in the back of my mind. It's only natural after all the disappointments we have been though on this journey, but I will not give up! When I get that feeling of fear, I try and push it away with more faith and positive thoughts.

Sunday was here and I was trying to keep busy. We had Kaiden for the weekend, and two of my nieces which helped pass the time. We were cleaning when my phone rang. When I answered and she told me that all 6 embryos were still growing as expected and looked great, again all I wanted to do was cry.  I hung up with the embryologist, and sat in the floor for a few minutes and just cried. I never knew the attachment I would feel to those 6 embryos beforehand. It's one of the most surreal feelings knowing I have 6 potential babies growing. For the majority of people at this point in pregnancy, they don't even know they are pregnant. For us, we know how many fertilized and we know how many have survived thus far. The embryologist said my embryo transfer date was Tuesday (tomorrow), and they wouldn't know until that morning which two embryos would be placed inside my uterus.

So here I am, the night before THE most important day of this whole process! All I can do is pray, pray, and pray harder that tomorrow will be successful, that my body cooperates, and the little embryos are able to implant. After tomorrow, there is about a 10 day gap before I will go back in and have blood work done to confirm pregnant or not pregnant. I ask that you continue to pray and keep us in your thoughts tomorrow and through the next 10 days or so.


The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.- Deuteronomy 31:8

Pre-Retrieval

Here we are, the night before the retrieval. A little nervous to say the least. I had my appointment this last Saturday to check the progress of the follicles. I also went in Monday and Tuesday morning for blood work and sonogram. The sonogram showed about 9 follicles on the right and a few on the left. This should give plenty of eggs to work with, hopefully! After the sonogram, I had a meeting with my IVF nurse informing me of my new "agenda" for the next few days of EVERYTHING I had to do and take, day by day.

 At 3 o'clock yesterday,  I had to take my last dose of meds. This meant I was still at school, so I had my school nurse give it to me. There was no way this girl was injecting herself with a needle! I also had to start a new medicine, but at least this one is oral meds. I have to take this one with food, otherwise I will get quite sick.  Last night at 11 I had to take the "trigger" shot, which is an HCG shot to mature the follicles and get them ready to release the eggs. Today I went in and got more blood work to check the HCG levels in my system. If they weren't high enough, I was going to have to stop at a pharmacy and give myself another injection. Thank goodness I didn't receive that phone call and my levels were good.

Tomorrow is one of the two most important days of this process. I will go in at 9 in the morning and check in, and my procedure will start around 10. Dr. Le said the actual procedure only takes about 20 minutes, although I have to be put under anesthesia so that should be fun :/

My mom and Brandon will both be there with me. They will also take a sample from Brandon so that after the egg retrieval they can put the egg and sperm together and they will hopefully fertilize. Otherwise they have to do that part manually, which cost another good amount. They will hold the embryos for 5 days and work their magic, then I will go back on Tuesday for the embryo transfer. Everything after that is up to my body. Lets just pray the embryo implants into my uterus next Tuesday and we will get good news in a couple weeks. I will try and update again on Friday, or possibly tomorrow after the procedure depending on how I am feeling. I don't really know what to expect, so don't count on it :) Thanks again for all the prayers, and keep them coming! Even though in the back of my mind I have a little fear of this not working, I have faith it will!

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.- John 14:27

I Trust the Lord Will Take Care of Me!

Sorry I haven't posted lately, it's been a whirlwind of a week! Since the last time I posted, I have been back to Dr. Le twice. Last week I went in for blood work, sonogram, and to talk to the nurse about how to administer all the medicine. Brandon was there with me last week because he is the one administering the shots. If you know me well, you know that I am deathly afraid of needles. Clearly that fear has had to subside for the time being with all the shots I am having to take.

The ultrasound last week was to see how many follicles we were going to be working with, and the blood work was to check my estrogen level to make sure it was safe to start meds. After discussing how to administer all the meds with our IVF nurse, I got to battle insurance and pharmacy miscommunication as well. Not to mention, pay the pharmacy for all my lovely medicine :( Anyways, it all got taken care of and I received all the medicine on my doorstep the next day.

Last Friday we started injections. Keep in mind, these injections are in the stomach. I have a small area where they can be so trying to not inject the same spot twice is a challenge. Friday and Saturday I just had two shots a day, one in the morning and one in the evening. I only had to take one of the medicines those two days. Sunday was when the fun shots started! We have to mix 3 different vials of medicine together in the morning and evening so that I am only having to take two shots a day, instead of 8. Thank you Jesus!! The process of mixing all the medicines and preparing for the injection takes a good 5-10 minutes, and boy does it STING! I have to tell myself that it will all be worth it in the end and the shot will only last a couple minutes, each and every time just to get through it.

I went back to Dr. Le today for MORE blood work and another sonogram. They will be taking blood each time from now on to check estrogen and progesterone levels. The sonogram was to monitor my follicles and see how the meds are working. As Dr. Le measured each follicle, he had me write down the size of each one for him and which ovary they came from. He was pleased to see that I have at least 10 that are growing as we speak. That was great news! If you don't remember, the follicle is where the egg comes from. If it doesn't grow and reach maturity, it won't release an egg. He wants each of the follicles to reach about an 18, before completing the egg retrieval. I will go back this Saturday for another ultrasound and I am sure more blood work :/ and possibly every morning next week to monitor their size. As of right now, the projected 'trigger' day is Wednesday and the projected retrieval day is next Friday. When I say 'trigger' I am talking about a different shot that will make all the follicles ready to release an egg so that on retrieval day they are good and ready.

We are almost through this difficult journey! Continued prayers are welcomed,  that this is our time and everything works out.

Lastly, I read this verse yesterday and it has kind of stuck with me...

Be still in the presence of the Lord, and wait patiently for him to act. -Psalm 37:7

And one of my best friends sent this one to me yesterday...

She does not fear bad news; she confidently trusts the Lord to take care of her. -Psalm 112:7

Give Me Grace to See Beyong this Moment Here

It's been a few days since I have updated. I went back to the Dr. on Wednesday for the trial transfer. This is where they measure how far in the uterus is, so that on the day of the actual embryo transfer they will know how far to insert the embryo. I was super nervous about this because it is similar to having an IUI (intrauterine insemination). Considering I have had 5 of those, I was pretty familiar with how uncomfortable they are. Some people have better experiences than others. Every time I had one, including the x-ray I had done previously, all the doctors had to use a clamp on my cervix to get the catheter in so they could reach my uterus. Needless to say, it's just a tad uncomfortable.

As I was waiting for Dr. Le to come in to the room, I was trying to calm my nerves by taking deep breathes and praying that I would find comfort and that the procedure wouldn't be as uncomfortable as my previous experiences. The wait seemed like FOREVER! When Dr. Le finally came in the room, he told me he would insert the catheter through the cervix and place a drop of iodine, then we would do an ultrasound to see where in the uterus it was. This lets him know how far in he would need to go in the future. I explained to him that my other Dr. had always had to use a clamp, and he was quick to say he shouldn't have to. I was relieved! The procedure took no longer than about a minute or two, we completed the ultrasound, and I was on my way to talk to the nurse about more IVF details.

The nurse came in and we discussed my tentative schedule for the weeks to come, how many vials of each medicine I would need to get from the pharmacy, the price for it all :( and what the next appointment would consist of. I will stop the birth control on Tuesday, go back in for an ultrasound and MORE blood work, go back again the next Thursday for another ultrasound, and POSSIBLE egg retrieval on October 24. This could change depending on how my ovaries respond to the meds, but that's why we have several ultrasounds to monitor this.

I had to go in for blood work yesterday, October 3, for some routine tests they complete before the IVF process. As I was telling a friend, over the past few months I have had enough blood work to supply a blood transfusion. Oh, well! Hopefully the outcome will be worth it all. So now it is sit and wait for the next Dr's appointment and I will go ahead and apologize ahead of time for the mood swings that are to come in the next couple weeks. Just remember and understand how many hormones I will be injecting each day. It will probably be in your best interest not to say or do anything that may make me mad. LOL

As I was driving home yesterday, I was listening to the song Greatness of Our God, so I will leave this message with you today:

Give me grace to see beyond this moment here,
to believe that there is nothing left to fear.
And You were on it, high above it all,

 You, my God, are greater still

GOD is ALWAYS greater than what you can see. I will continue to pray, keep my faith, and trust he will answer my prayers.